Milk Does A Body Good

My 16-year-old was getting milk last night.


“I don’t understand why I have to sit through these talks with mom,” he very, very mildly complained to me. “We sit there, and she talks with me about school and tells me what to do, and I don’t really do anything except sit there and watch her shuffle through papers. And then she tells me what to do. And I do it the next day. Why do I have to sit there while she’s telling me what to do? All she’s doing is giving me a plan for the next day that I’m going to follow.”

I smiled, remembering feeling the same feelings.

“I’ll bet ya that if you came up with a plan yourself, you wouldn’t have to sit there and listen to her come up with a plan for you, and it might be easier for you.”

He continued being very, very mildly complainy.

“But I don’t want to come up with my own plan.”

“I’ll bet ya,” I smiled at him, “that’s why you continue to sit there and listen to your mom come up with a plan for you.”

He put the milk back, and by the small light touching his face from inside the fridge, I could see that he was smiling with complete understanding of the situation and what he was going through, as well as feeling loved by me and not judged in any way. He then, put his head down, and rammed my stomach several times with the top of his head. He was laughing and moaning at the same time, happy and frustrated simultaneously.



Those are the moments when you can see your children growing, realizing they are powerful individuals who haven’t quite figured out how to actualize their own power and knowledge. And I like remembering those moments. I felt important. And I liked seeing our boy get it. And, yeah, he’ll have to be reminded that he knows that he’s powerful and knowledgeable. Probably have to be reminded a lot. And that’s why I’m here, and that’s why his mother is here, and my mother, and my step-father.



Now if I could find this kind of success and fulfillment in training the goddam cat to quit sinking her tiny paws into the most tender areas of my gut and testicles. Goddam cat.