Feeling kinda stupid about all the time and energy I put into acting and performing. For thirty five years it was my life. And then I dropped all of it. Seems like such a waste. Like renting a house and fixing it up a lot, and then leaving. We did that with our last house. We thought we would buy it. We didn't, and I'm glad we didn't. But it seemed like a really big waste to fix all that plumbing and then leave. I get it-- it needed to be done. And I get it-- we can't take it with us. And I get it-- I wouldn't have done it differently. I get it. Just feels like a waste. Like my first 35 years.
I guess I'm missing it today. After being denied a promotion twice now, it's tough not to think about a time when I felt good at my profession. Without therapy or medication.
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