Simon And The Drought

A village was trying desperately to stay alive during a great drought. They held a meeting where all the leaders of the community got together to try to figure out how they were going to deal with the crisis.

“The problem is the motor operating the pump in the water well,” said the village plumber. “The pump in the well isn’t pulling the water to the pipes. If we can get the pump motor to actually run, it will pump the water into the pipes, the pipes will carry the water to the village and we will all be saved!”


The village leaders tried desperately to find somebody who could repair the motor. People came and took a look at it, but no one could figure out how to fix the broken motor. Some of them said that it was a gearing wheel that needed to be replaced, but when they replaced the gearing wheel, the motor still didn’t work. Others said that the motor was broken due to brittle gasket heads. But again, when the brittle gasket heads were replaced, the motor still didn’t work.
Simon had been working on an idea for a ventilator for his home. Because of the great drought, his home had become incredibly hot, and Simon was building a system in which the hot air would be sucked out of his home. He had hoped that this system would allow him to feel some relief from the heat of the world. He had been working in secret in his basement, not telling anyone about this idea. When he had first come up with the idea, he had told his friends about it. They had laughed at him and made fun of him. What in the world was he thinking—sucking hot air from his home. Why didn’t he just buy an air conditioner? That would be the best solution, they all mocked. Simon had mentioned his idea to some people he worked with at the village mail office, but they all laughed at him, as well. One lady had actually choked on her turkey sandwich, she was laughing so hard. “That’s what an air conditioner is for, stupid! You’re idea is to invent an air conditioner that doesn’t make things cooler?! How ridiculous!” But for some strange reason, Simon couldn’t let the idea go. He felt compelled to build his ventilator, but silently, without notice, so as to minimize derision.

He had completed the ventilator, and it worked quite well, but upon hearing about the well pump, Simon wondered if his ventilator would work to solve the drought crisis. Alone, in his basement, Simon constructed a small version of the village well, along with pipes and water, and attached his ventilator where the well pump would go. Simon then turned on the ventilator. It sputtered for a moment, then, almost silently, the ventilation system kicked in and the water from the well was brought to the surface pipes and drained all over Simon’s basement floor. It worked! Simon grabbed the ventilator and ran out of the house.


He found the village gathered in the local tavern, the only place that could afford to purchase an air conditioner. Simon proudly carried his ventilator to a table where to local leaders were sitting, enjoying lukewarm ale. But before Simon could say a word, one of the leaders noticed the ventilator in his arms and let out a scoff. “What, did you invent something else that has already been invented?” The table erupted into laughter. Simon tried to get them to listen to him, but he was interrupted again. “Maybe you’ve invented a chair for you to sit on! Did you invent a chair to sit on?” And with that, one of the leaders pushed Simon to the floor. “Look boys,” said another leader. “He’s joined us for a mug of ale but he’s got nothing to drink. Let’s help him out!” And they all took joyous turns pouring their warm ale all over Simon’s mouth and nose. Simon shook his head from one side to the other, trying to find a place where he could breathe air into his lungs, rather than ale, but his ventilator was heavy on his chest and he couldn’t move very much. The leaders continued to pour their ale on Simon, until, finally, Simon had drowned on the floor of the tavern.

The leaders and the patrons stared at Simon’s lifeless body, lying on the floor. They hadn’t really intended to kill him, but now that he was gone, they didn’t really mind. He was a crazy man with crazy ideas, and he wasn’t really helping anyone in the village. Their moment of silence wasn’t all that long. Simon didn’t really deserve a long moment of silence. Just enough to let everyone know that his death was an accident, not intentional, and above all else, no one was to blame for his death except for Simon.


As they pulled his body out of the tavern, they took notice of the device he was carrying. They decided to throw the device away with Simon. It would be as useless as his body. After all, what good is a silly man and his silly ideas?