White Psych

My shrink is not a shrink.  He's a psych.  And in my head, there's a difference. 

A shrink helps you to think differently and deal with your emotions (the term "shrink" has origins in "head shrinker", which was a term given to a person who didn't prescribe medicine, but helped you lessen the worries in your head).  A psych is a doctor who gives you drugs, like a doctor who gives you a cast for your broken leg.

If you put a cast on a broken leg, the leg usually gets better and you can use the leg like you normally would.  If you put that same cast on a leg with diabetic neuropathy, the leg wouldn't get better simply from applying the cast.  So a cast isn't always the correct fix for a leg that isn't working correctly.

Our bodies produce chemicals.  Sometimes we produce too many chemicals.  Sometimes we produce too few chemicals.  And medications can assist us with the over- or under-production of those chemicals.  Serotonin, also known as 5-HT, is thought to be a contributor to feelings of well-being and happiness.  It is a chemical found in humans.  So (simplified), if you are sad because it's raining out, a shrink might talk to you about it, while a psych might prescribe medicine for you.  And when the rain stopped, no matter which doctor you went to, they would see their treatment as successful, because now you feel better.  They would attribute your feeling better to their treatment, and not to the stopping of the rain fall.

I signed a petition today asking Florida Governor Rick Scott to condemn the actions of Attorney General Angela Corey and suspend her from her office, while condemning the charges against Marissa Alexander.

Very quickly, Treyvon Martin was shot and killed by George Zimmerman in Florida in 2012.  George Zimmerman was ultimately released without being arrested because, according to Florida's "Stand Your Ground" statue, the police can't arrest somebody who is acting in self-defense, even when lethal force is being used.  And since there was no one to refute Zimmerman's claim of acting in self-defense (Trevyon Martin died in under 30 minutes, and Zimmerman was questioned for 5 hours), Zimmerman was set free.  All perfectly legal under Florida law.  Marissa Alexander fired a warning shot at her husband, killing no one and hurting no one, and was sentenced to 20 years in prison.  This conviction was overturned.  Now, Florida Attorney General Angela Corey is pushing for Marissa Alexander to sent to prison for 60 years.  If you would like to read about the Marissa Alexander case from a source who is not in favor of Marissa Alexander, please Google search Marissa Alexander mediatracker and find the blog at mediatracker.org.  This blog (not credible news source) lays out how it's clear George Zimmerman obviously was acting in self-defense because he had scratches on his head, and how it was obvious that Marissa Alexander was obviously not acting in self defense because she didn't leave through the front, back, or garage doors of the house she was in.  This article also points out the garage door was broken and was unusable.  It also points out that Marissa's husband had five children by five different women, and he admitted to beating all but one of them.  He also admitted that he had all but threatened to kill Marissa on the day she fired the warning shot at him.  He admitted to beating her in the past.  He admitted that she had never used the gun against him or any of his children.  Depending on which story you believe, Marissa fired the gun into the ceiling of their home while in the presence of her husband and two other children, or perhaps simply her husband.  There are a lot of things we don't really know about Marissa's case.

Here's what we know for certain: George Zimmerman shot and killed Treyvon Martin.  He did not receive any jail or prison time.  He defended himself using Florida's Stand Your Ground statute which allows an individual to use lethal force to defend themselves.

Here's what we know for certain: Marissa Alexander shot a gun at her husband.  Her husband has a documented history of domestic attack, and admitted that he was involved in attacking Marissa on the day of the shooting.  No one was hurt or killed.  Marissa was sentenced to 20 years prison time.  This sentence was overturned, and now she's being re-tried for 60 years of prison time.  Marissa Alexander tried to use the Florida's Stand Your Ground statute in court and it did not work for her like it did for George Zimmerman.

These are the facts, and they are undisputed by any party on either side of the argument.

To say that there are "sides" to this "argument" really, really angers me.  There shouldn't be sides.  There shouldn't be an argument.  It is tragic that a young teenager was shot and killed for walking when the sun wasn't out.  He was armed with a bottle of tea and a bag of candy.  He was wearing a black hoodie.  And he was shot to death.  A mother, who had been repeatedly beaten by her husband, fired a warning shot at him and was sentenced to 20 years in prison.  These two things, when put next to each other, are absolutely preposterous and point out just how stupid, stupid, stupid, utterly stupid we have become as a society.  We are inconsistent, at best.  We are completely corrupt, almost certainly.

At this time, I want to point out that I have not introduced race into this at all, because to me, it's not important.  The players involved could all be purple, and the facts would be the same.  It muddies the waters to start thinking about these cases as some kind of racial thing.  However, that probably plays some part in both cases.  Geraldo Rivera famously stated that Treyvon Martin was as much to blame for his being shot to death as George Zimmerman was (who pulled the trigger on the gun) because Treyvon was wearing a black hoodie, and that type of clothing invites fear and suspicion. 

I have worn a black hoodie every day of my life since 2006.  I have yet to be shot or shot at.

It seems fundamentally obvious to me that Treyvon Martin paid a higher price than Marissa Alexander's husband, who is still free to beat his next few "baby mammas" (his words). 

I feel powerless in my own life to stop my wife from being beaten by her ex-husband, her lawyers who have all told her that her troubles are her own fault and the result of bad moves on her part, they have increased her stress and decreased her self-confidence, her mother who continues to choose her ex-husband over her, and people she once thought were friends.  I feel powerless, as I stand by and watch all of it. 

I.  Cannot.  Do.  Anything.  To Help.  My Best Friend.

And I remember school lessons telling me that the way the United States legal system was set up was to protect the innocent.  It would be better to let bad people go free than to see one innocent person locked in jail falsely.  That's what I was told all through school.  I was also told to be truthful.  This was a virtue and something I should implement in my life. 

When I think about these things, I'm beaten across my face with the undeniable fact that these things are not the way the Real World works.  And it makes me question to the core the value of the "good education" I received as a child and teenager.

I'm a smart man.  And this situation makes me feel fantastically dumb.

My wife's problems could be over in less than an hour after I purchased a gun and shot her ex-husband and mother in self-defense.  There would be no one to refute that I was acting in self-defense.  Because they would be dead.

And I look white.  So obviously I'm innocent.  It's my birthright.



I want to make a difference.
I want to help the world.
I want to stop being shit upon.
I want to stop being abused.
I want my wife to stop being abused.
And I have no control over any of it unless I kill people.
Which goes against my every fiber.

So when my wife's ex-husband and mother die, and I am no longer sad... my psych will say, "I'm glad the medications are working."
At which point, I will feel even sadder, as there goes another blissfully ignorant person into the world.  Somebody who doesn't understand, but who seems to have credentials that make people believe him.  And he's a man.  And white.