Sam Neil Will Save Us All

Just listen to me without fighting me.  After I've had my time, you're free to make up your own mind about life:

How much money would somebody have to pay you to have your picture taken and have that picture plastered all over billboards across the nation?  Maybe you'd do it for free, right?  I wonder why anyone would pay thousands of dollars to take your picture and put it on a billboard?  Well, I suppose if I stood to gain something from your picture on the billboards it might justify spending thousands of dollars, right?  Like, if I was selling something, and I knew that if your picture would help me sell my whatever, maybe I would pay you thousands of dollars for your picture in the hopes of making that money back when I sell my whatever-I'm-selling, right?  Okay, so maybe I won't pay *you* thousands of dollars for your picture, because you're not really going to help me sell my whatever.  But maybe Sam Neil's picture can help me sell my whatever.  Maybe I'll pay him thousands of dollars to help me sell my whatever.  And maybe people will buy my whatever because they like Sam Neil, they believe Sam Neil, they feel like Sam Neil took care of them when they went to Jurassic Park and Dr. Grant wouldn't lie to me.  If Sam Neil/Dr. Grant's picture is on something, it's probably a pretty good thing, right?  Maybe it won't save me from rampaging velociraptors, but it will sure try. 

But what if Sam Neil doesn't have any idea about what he's selling his picture to?  What if he's selling his picture to, oh... say Cox Cable.  Let's say, hypothetically, that Cox Cable went to Sam Neil and said, "We want you to sell our stuff to people because they believe you and like you and think you will keep them safe."  And Sam Neil then said, "No, I don't know about your products and I don't want to do that."  And then Cox Cable says, "We'll pay you far more money than is needed because we're putting a price on your integrity, likability and public appeal.  If we try to sell our products, people won't buy them.  But if we have your influence, people will buy our products.  Please let us use you to benefit us.  Let's translate this previous sentiment into this concise, socially acceptable statement: we'll pay you a fuck-load of money."  And Sam Neil then sells his integrity, his influence, his POWER OVER YOU for a fuck-load of money. 

I wonder if his mother is proud of him for influencing people with his powers simply because he got paid.  I wonder if his wife is happy that he got paid a lot of money to persuade people to give their money to Cox when they normally wouldn't have.  I wonder why more people don't think it's a bad thing to lie to others and not improve the world simply because there is a fuck-load of money at the end of the story.

If I had gotten paid a fuck-load of money from Cox Cable to write what you have just written, you would probably have a different feeling about what you had just read.  "Oh, he got paid to write this?  Well then, it's okay.  Good job!"

Carry on.