Emailing Them

they should make something that makes your kids not say dumb shit.

or better yet, they should make something that makes your kids not dumb.

or better yet, they should make something that doesn't make you worry about your kids when they say dumb shit that makes you worry about if they're going to freeze on the streets and never eat another meal again if they do the stupid shit they say they're going to do.

or better yet, they should make something that lets you jump to the moment after the dumb shit is said when you realize that your kid was just venting frustrations or saying something dumb like you said when you were a kid because we're all human.  you know, that moment where you look back on the stupid shit and smile because everything is fine, and you look at your kid, who's also smiling because everything is fine, and you both laugh at each other and say, "wow, that was some stupid shit!  i'm glad everything turned out okay!"

or better yet, they should make something that doesn't allow you to worry about anything.  ever.

or better yet, they should make something that gives me eight hundred million dollars a minute, and allows me to sleep at night, and makes my wife, two boys, mother, and step-father happy and comfortable.  And it should play good music always that suits the mood you're in.  And it should dispense milk.  Free milk.  And it should feel like a brand-new sock going on.  And the best pillow you've ever slept on.  And smell like freshly-popped pop corn right before the movie starts.  And feels like your mother hugging you at night.  The kind of hug that lets you know everything is okay and you lets you settle down enough to feel comfortable and good in your bed and not think about anything but the warmth of sleep and how deeply you will rest.

that's what they should do.

does anyone have an email address for them?