Trains Of Thought

My iPod plays the Meow Mix commercial, where the announcer says that the cat food has three flavors which cats like best: tuna, liver and chicken.

I think: How the fuck do you know what flavors cats like best??

I respond to myself: Well, you put down plates of tuna, liver, chicken, potatoes, sauerkraut, skunk, old Ralph Waldo Emerson notes, pantie liners, sweat and haircuts, and the cat goes to the ones he likes best. Easy way to tell what somebody or something likes: watch what they choose to do.

Watch what they choose to do...

My eleven-year-old says he wants a Mohawk haircut. He is about to let his mother shave his head when he gets a text from his father telling him that his father will get him a Mohawk. So my eleven-year-old chooses to let his father give him his next haircut: a "high and tight", a style worn by men in the military. It is not a Mohawk, and the reason he gives for not getting a mohawk haircut is because his scalp will burn more with a Mohawk than with a high and tight. This, of course, makes no sense, and it makes no sense to him even as he's saying it. But he chose to have a high and tight, just like the military men. On those men it looks bad. On my eleven-year-old, it looks horrible. He says he likes it. After it grows out, he asks his mother to shave his head. She asks if he wants a Mohawk. He looks at her quizzically, and reminds him that he had wanted a mohawk for a long time. As she reminds him, he remembers that he had wanted one. He chooses to let his mother give him a Mohawk and for the week he's with his mother, he gets nothing but praise for his haircut from me, his mother and his brother. He says, repeatedly, that he likes his haircut. He goes to his father's house. He comes back to his mother's house, and his head is shaved. I say, "Your head is shaved."
He says, "Yeah."
I say, "Did you not like your Mohawk?"
"No, I liked it."
"That doesn't make a lot of sense," I tell him, lightly. "When you like something, you don't change it normally. But you can do whatever you want to do."

Later on, he says that his father had told him that people would make judgements about his father based on his haircut. My wife asked if that's why he had shaved off the Mohawk, and he immediately and emphatically said no.

So if you watch what my eleven-year-old does, he changes things that he says that he likes and gives no reason for the changes. He does not change while he is with his mother. He changes after being with his father. He changes things that he has stated he likes. He denies that there are issues with his father.

It is possible that these actions go on over at his father's, as well. It is possible that he is staying the same over there and changing things he likes when he's with us.

I wonder what kind of cat food Meow Mix would make if my eleven-year-old were their test cat? And what would the slogan be? "Flavors so good, your cat will choose something else!"