Making Me Laugh (Worth Repeating)

The following is from a Monty Python sketch called "Doctor Quote". I've enjoyed it for years and it has made me laugh out loud so many times. The pure absurdity is so wonderfully my style of humor. Before this scene begins, we hear Michael Palin narrating his life as if it were a mystery novel, except nothing out of the ordinary happens to him. At the end of the previous sketch, which runs into "Doctor Quote", Michael Palin's character, Mr. Eegis, is ushered out of the house by his wife, played by Terry Jones, as she is preparing breakfast for the doctor, who is inexplicably at their home. The scene begins after Mr. Eegis is shoved out the front door, and Mrs. Eegis continues to talk with the doctor, played by Graham Chapman, who is eating breakfast at their kitchen table.

MRS. EEGIS: (refering to her husband who has just left) Oh, I'm so worried about him, doctor.
DOCTOR: (licking his lips and swallowing a delicious bite of breakfast) Yes. Yes, I know what you mean. I'm afraid he's suffering from what we doctors call whooping cough. That is, the failure of the autonomic nervous section of the brain to deal with the nerve impulses that enable you or I to retain some facts and eliminate others.
MRS. EEGIS: Another dog?
DOCTOR: Uh, not for me, thank you.
MRS. EEGIS: I'll have one last one.

(During the following monologue, we hear the bark of a dog in the background, followed by the shot of a gun, the soft thud of the dead dog, acknowledgment of the kill by MRS. EEGIS, and then the sound of flesh frying in a pan or skillet, presumably with butter or marmelade. That last part was created by my, by the way. I have no way of knowing the correct sauce in which to pan-fry dog.)

DOCTOR: The human brain is like an enormous fish. It's flat and slimy, and has gills through which it can see.

(Gunshot, and thud of dead dog is heard)

MRS. EEGIS: There we are.

(Frying of dog heard)

DOCTOR: Should one of these gills fail to open, the messages transmitted by the lungs don't reach the brain. It's as simple as that.
MRS. EEGIS: Well, I'm a simple soul. I don't understand all that. All I know is he's not the same man as I married.
DOCTOR: Am I the man you married, Mrs. Eegis?

(The DOCTOR playfully approaches MRS. EEGIS, excited about his anticipated sexual encounter with her.)

MRS. EEGIS: Ooh! Now, get away! Ooh, you'll get struck on!
DOCTOR: Come on, come on!
MRS. EEGIS: I can't! I'm eating dog!
DOCTOR: Come on, just a quick examination!

(The tearing of fabric is heard)

MRS. EEGIS: Get off! I'm married! Ooh! Ooh!
MICHAEL PALIN (resuming his mysterious narrator voice joyfully): But Dr. Kwat was a man of quite remarkable medical insight, skill, and determination. And within a few minutes, he had completely removed my wife's knickers!
MRS. EEGIS (scoldingly, to MICHAEL PALIN): Get out, you!

(MICHAEL PALIN is thrown out of the room by his wife, and the door slams shut behind him. More fabric is heard ripping, as the doctor continues his sexual examination of Mrs. Eegis, who is playfully resisting his obviously welcomed advances.)

MRS. EEGIS: Ooh, ooh, Dr. Kwat!
DOCTOR: Put your tongue in my mouth!
MRS. EEGIS: Don't! (As she does)
DOCTOR: Oh come on, I've got your knickers!
MRS. EEGIS: Oh, wow, ooh!!

(Triumphant music plays as the scene fades out)